I feel so out of touch with my sense of intuition at the moment. There's a situation that's causing me so much anxiety but I have no idea if the worry is justified or if I'm just having anxiety symptoms. Basically I recently signed up to do this new medical treatment, nothing major but it could improve my life a bit, and at first I was super excited to try it but after a couple of days I've just been filled with a sense of dread about it. Everyone always says 'follow your gut', but that's pretty much impossible with an anxiety disorder. Idk whether my anxiety is just trying to prevent me from trying something new & scary due to the unknown but which could help me, or if I really should not go through with it. I can't stand this shit.
One of the most important things that can help with depression is finding something to do to occupy your mind so you don't spend that time ruminating. I am a geek. I love building computers and have been at it for twenty years now. While I love the hobby, it is too damn expensive to do much. I am trying to find clientele, but competition is stiff and I cannot get parts at a discount. I thought Raspberry Pi was just a gimmick. I have to tell you, this is a blast. If you have any skills or would like to develop them, this is for you. It is cheap and there are unlimited possibilities. It can become addicting, but I would rather be addicted to playing with my Pi than anything else. Have fun.
Came from a party and walked home with anothet woman, she (married) told me how a group of men had talked about 'some poor woman' who was single and spoke multiple languages and how there had to be something wrong with her for her to be single still. It was me. They were talking about me. I was one of two single women there and I am the only one who matched the description. And there is something wrong with me, obviously. I suffer from childhood neglect, low self-esteem and depression.
But shit. Hearing it like this felt like pinning a scarlet letter to my chest. How do we deal with our obvious issues? Hide or own up to them? Dating is a distant possibility right now but it feels like inviting people to a dumpster fire at this point. Front row seats to the train wreck included.
Or maybe a first world problem... I'm off long term sick for chronic migraine atm and my boyfriend has been ill with a bug and been off for nearly two weeks so he's been in the house with me. First week he was ill I had a lot of appointments and was out of the house every day, but not so much for the last week, especially since I got the bug too. So my opportunities to binge on chocolate have been curtailed and I haven't binged for over a week. I have an issue with binging on sweet foods and addiction to chocolate, I'm generally dealing with it but abstinence isn't really my goal right now, but it's horrible and embarrassing. I've had anxiety and depression since adolescence and misused food since I was about 11. I'm just finishing up a course of cbt for my food issues so I understand them much better and have much fewer issues with shame, kinda understand it as a coping strategy. I'm type 2 diabetic, not on insulin, my control is so-so, but I've got no organ damage yet. I binge less and my diabetic control is better than it was a year ago I think.
Thing is, I'm depressed now, have been for a few days, I am certain that not having the chocolate intake and not binging like I'm used to is a major factor in this. My boyfriend is back at work. Do I binge because it will probably help my mental health (a poor coping strategy is still a coping strategy), and I have enough going on with the migraines etc without trying to stop that right now? Or do I take this opportunity of a weeks "head start" on abstinence from binging and try to deal with the depression another way, given that I don't have work to contend with atm?
I'm happy to provide more details, but I think this post is long enough now. Genuinely interested in what other people would do... I'm not sure I can manage the depression and the migraine...
Those of us with mental health issues have bad days. When we have bad days we may say things or react in ways we wouldnt when well.
Its much more helpful to people when we talk to them about whats wrong and how to do better, than to collectively negate comments by downvoting.
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